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Here and elsewhere you can find hundreds of articles offering advice for starting relationships, thriving in relationships, ending relationships, and recovering after a relationship ends.
No matter its source, trauma is insidious and can impact you more and more over time.
Emotional involvement feels like an alien language to you, and since you felt unlovable in your past, you couldn't possibly be lovable now.
In this category and in the previous one, you may recognize that society or family think you’re “supposed” to desire more or you may want a relationship, but in both these scenarios, the previously established pattern of avoidance of intimacy – regardless of reasons – preempts your ability to engage further and cultivate an intimate relationship.
You may desire more even though you are afraid of letting yourself have it, or you may wonder if it's okay to be okay in your aloneness.2.
Guardedness and Rigid Boundaries: Confusing Signals from Past Caregivers Did you grow up with rigid boundaries, with little to non-existent emotional involvement from caregivers?
Or did you have that kind of experience with previous partners?